I was riding down to lunch in a relatively crowded elevator at work and two guys were in opposite corners carrying on a conversation about work over everyones heads. Then, this happened:

Guy #1:

You want go go out tomorrow night?

Guy #2:

Sure, I told you I’m single again right?

Guy #1, as if embarrassed by this personal detail in a public elevator:

Uhm, let’s talk about this over lunch.

and then Guy #1 continues:

By the way, I’m probably going to go for a ‘rub and tug’ after lunch, this Asian girl I go to is really into fiddling with my asshole.

Absolutely beautiful.